Alcoholics of the Future

The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention held a press conference today to address concerns over the recent spike in cases of alcohol-related deaths connected with time-displacement. Dr. Marcus Fiteegue, a spokesman for the CDC suggested that the number of instances of Hangover Displacement Syndrome (HDS) brought on by increased availability of a range of "Pay now, Party Later" (PNPL) devices such as Pineapple™, PaP® and Horkbefor™ are responsible.

"These products allow for easy consumption of dangerous amounts of alcohol, the effects of which are felt before any actual consumption takes place," said the spokesman. He added that college students and social drinkers were the most at risk.

Grand Romantic Delusions, Chapter 27: The Attack

     "You already know, Seth," said Katie. "Think about your dreams."

     "So you think they really are repressed memories?"

     "Not merely repressed," she responded. "I think maybe LaBelle intentionally deleted some of your memories."

     "But, why? And how?"

     "I'm not sure about the how of it, but I'd guess the why has to do with the fact that they canceled the tests. Well, that and the secret and probably illegal nature of the whole program."

     "You mean this TIER thing?" Lewis asked. "Why didn't they wipe my memories, then? And why don't I remember this O'Keefe guy at all? Oh, wait … " His voice faltered.

     "You two have probably never even met before now,"  replied Katie. "I doubt they bothered with your memories, Wright. You were only involved in one small, failed trial. Seth was recruited for the larger program—Strange Animal, I mean—not just TIER."

     "So what is Strange Animal?"

     "It's an enhanced combination of two other programs. TIER was one of them. The other was called WEIRD."

     "Weird Tier," interjected Mary. "'Tier' is German for 'animal', so …"

     "Exactly," said Katie, though she pointedly refused to look at Mary. She was focused on Seth.  "The government has a funny sense of humor when it comes to naming black-box projects. And they love acronyms."

     "So what, exactly," asked Mary, "was WEIRD all about?"

     "Warfighter Enhancement Incorporating Recombinant DNA."

Grand Romantic Delusions, Chapter 26: The Intruder

     "Bricked? You mean, like …" Nita started, then thought better of it. "What the hell, lady? You have your phone set up with a code that bricks it? Who the fuck are you?"

     "I told you," smiled Katie in a way Nita found infuriatingly smug. "May name's Kathleen."

     "No ID, no keys, no cash, but you have a phone that deletes itself instantly. I want to know a whole lot more than just your bloody name. Out with it!"

     "I'm afraid I can't do that, Ms. Herrera." Katie smiled again. "I mean, unless you just want to know about my taste in food, favorite places to shop, that sort of thing. Though I'm guessing from the knife in your hand and the pulsating bulge in your forehead that you're not wanting to make friends with me."

     "Oh, so you think you're funny, too, huh?" Nita waved the knife about casually and turned to Lewis. "Looks like we've got ourselves a couple of comedians, here. We'll see how funny they think they are when the police get here." She leaned in close to Katie's face. "Assuming they're still breathing by then."

     "Right. First of all, though this would all go far more easily for me if the local authorities actually were on their way, I very much doubt they are." And here Katie gave Nita a particularly infuriating smile, before adding, "Secondly, I don't respond well to threats. So, you might want to put that thing away before you hurt yourself."

Grand Romantic Delusions Chapter 25: The Questioning

     "What's your name, creep?" Nita pushed Seth into the living room chair.

     "Umm, I'm uh … Hey!" He gave Nita a scandalized look. "I'm not a creep!"

     "Then, why," she asked, "have you been sitting there watching our house?"

     "I wasn't—"

     "Shut up!" Nita scowled at him. "I'm in no mood for lies, pajero."

     Lewis went to the open door, looked up and down the street, and closed it behind him. He said, "I don't see anyone else around. I hope you didn't freak any of the neighbors out too much."

     "I couldn't care less," replied Nita. "Let 'em call the police, if that's what they want. I'll just hand this asshole right over to them."

     She turned back to Seth, "It'll take them a bit to get here, though, and in the mean time, you're going to answer some questions."

     "But … you just told me to shut up."

     "Shut up with your lies, I mean. And don't speak unless I tell you to."

     "Yes, ma'am," Seth said, trying to collect his wits.

     Lewis went into the kitchen and returned with a roll of masking tape.

     "Lewis, honey," began Nita. "I need duct tape, not that."

     "Sorry," he replied. "It's all we have. I can go check the basement."

     "No," she sighed. "It'll have to do. This won't be long, anyway."

     "You!" She pointed at Seth. "Lean forward, hands behind your back."

     "No," said Seth. "You don't have the right—"

     Nita grabbed Seth by the small hairs at the back of his neck and pulled him forward,"

     "Ow! Ow! OWW! "

     "I wasn't asking you, cuca. I said DO it!"

Grand Romantic Delusions Chapter 24: The Watcher

    Katie decided that before reporting anything more to Hanlon she would take a day or so to see if Seth did anything unusual in the aftermath of their date. Then again, with Seth, how could one tell what was unusual?

     She also reasoned it might be a good idea take precautions to be sure she could find him. He had proven to be wilier than she had expected, after all. She had considered tracing his cell phone, but didn't want to go through the hassle that would entail. She settled on placing a tracker on his car, instead. Perhaps she could manage to finagle a second date out of him, eventually, or—if he was serious about not wanting a relationship—at least get a chance to friend-zone him and an opportunity to visit his home. She hit her downtown hotel room and picked up some fresh clothes, along with the equipment she needed, before heading over to Cortona Road, doing her now customary loop around the neighborhood so as to be ready to exit as quickly as possible without turning.

     As Katie pulled around the corner, she stopped in front of a large tree on the opposite side of the street, but a bit further around the corner than the last time she'd been here. Curiously, there was a different car in the driveway this time: an ancient Toyota Tercel hatchback. This new vehicle was painted in a dirty brown that looked like rust—though parts of it appeared to be the genuine article. As she watched, Seth arrived in his Camaro, and a man stepped out of the brown hatchback. 

Grand Romantic Delusions Chapter 22: The Morning

     O'Keefe awoke to the sound of his phone issuing a text alert. He looked around the unfamiliar surroundings, confused, until the memories of the previous night began to assemble themselves in his pounding head. That'll go away, he thought. Just need to find some aspirin and some protein. That had been quite a night. He was surprised how it turned out. He hadn't intended to sleep with Svetlana, but he had no regrets. He'd really grown fond of her, and well, maybe that was just the emotional release he'd needed. She hadn't seemed to mind, either. The part of him that worried he may have taken advantage of her drunken state was quieted by the recollection that she had somehow appeared to be quite a bit more sober and in control than he had been. Russians! Guess their notoriety for putting away the vodka is well-earned.

     His phone beeped at him again, so he picked it up, and tapped his code on the screen. It was a text from Gary which read:

               found her!

               Mary Dagfridchen

               Hillard  ph 555-2336

               u want address?

     Oh no! Mary! What had he done? How could he say he loved her after he'd slept with another woman? He would have to make amends. The first thing to do was to get the hell out of this hotel room. Where was Svetlana, anyway?

     He stood quickly, scrambling around for the clothing he'd so hastily and eagerly shed the night before. He heard the sound of water running from behind the bathroom door. Must be showering. What should he do? Should he just leave? That was just too classless. He would have to face her, tell her last night had been a mistake. It was the right thing to do—the only thing to do. He hoped she hadn't fallen for him too hard. This was going to be awkward enough without that.

Grand Romantic Delusions Chapter 20: The Director

     "What have you got for us, Hanlon?" The woman behind the desk spoke sharply. "Have you learned anything useful?"

     Hanlon was perpetually uncomfortable in this office—and it was clearly designed with just that purpose in mind. The simple act of crossing the distance from the door to the desk left him feeling like an intruder into a sacred space. The Director's desk sat atop a dais, so that he had to look up in order to address her, and when she leaned back in her seat, he was forced to address the empty air. There was a large Labelle company seal etched into the Ashford Black Marble of the wall behind the chair, flanked by flags of the United States and the various branches of the armed forces. The room's primary lighting fixtures shone from behind the desk, which made it difficult to read the Director's expression.

     "I can't say for sure, ma'am," he replied. "But, of course I'm still not sure what this is really all about."

     "You know what you need to know."

     "I just had a call from my agent. She's with the target now."

     "And?"

  

Grand Romantic Delusions Chapter 19: The Date (pt. 2)

Part II

     "OK," said Seth, leaning across the table. "I told you where I work."

     "Yes," replied Katie. "You work in this secret laboratory. But this is not so unusual. You said to me that you only clean the place, yes?"

     "Yeah, I only clean up, but I still see things, you know?"

     "What kind of things are you seeing?"

     "Things I … I'm not sure I understand them. But, there are weird things going on there all the time."

     "But if this work is for government, do they not already know of strange goings-on?"

     "Yeah, but maybe they worry about how much I know, and whether I'll tell the wrong person."

     "Did you talk to wrong person, you think?" Now she was finally getting somewhere—this is what Hanlon had hired her to do.

     "No," he replied. "I don't really talk much about work—at least not with people outside of work."

     "Then if government watches you, and knows you have done nothing wrong, you have no reason to fear, yes?"

     "I guess it depends …"

     "Have no others asked you about this work? Friends or family?"

     "I don't have any family to speak of—and few friends."

     "Besides," Katie said, "you are only worrying without proof. American government does not do such things like Russian—"

     "Wait!" Seth interrupted her. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a small electronic device. "This is my proof."

     "What is this thing?" Katie recognized it immediately as a data snooper. She reached out a tentative finger, as if she wanted to touch it but was afraid.

     "It's a snooper," said Seth. "It tracks electronic data signals that go through a particular device."

Grand Romantic Delusions Chapter 17: The Café

     Another day. Another café. Sometimes—when on the job—Katie felt as though all she did was go from one coffee shop to another; talking to different people in each one, exchanging notes or packages. She could imagine a worse life—sometimes she felt as though she'd lived several worse lives already—but it grew tiring at times.

     This one was quite busy; unlike the book store she'd spent the evening in with O'Keefe. She suspected Lewis Wright had known it would be busy. He had been more than a little skittish and didn't want to meet with her at first, but when she had said they could meet in public and even let him pick the location he finally relented. Why is my life so full of fearful, paranoid men?

     The table he'd designated wasn't open when she'd arrived, but she had watched and waited like a vulture and snagged it as soon as the occupants had left. That was one of many reasons why she always arrived early to these things. 

     She wore a dark blue pin-striped pantsuit with a white lily pinned to the jacket. This was how she'd told Lewis to identify her. She had her hair tied back in a tight bun and wore a pair of wire-frame glasses with non-prescription lenses. All of this, of course, helped her get into her May Parker: Serious Scientist persona. 

Grand Romantic Delusions Chapter 03: The Meeting

     "You are sure this is the best way to handle it?"

     "This is the only way to handle it."

     "But, isn't the process untested—at least on human subjects?"

     "True. It might not work."

     "Aren't you worried it might kill him?"

     "It might, but that's a risk we're willing to take."

     "Assuming he survives … how will we know for sure?"

     "We'll have to keep a close eye on him."

     "Close?"

     "Extremely close."

     "You have a plan for that?"

     "Of course. We have plans for everything."

     "So I've heard. How does this one work?"

     "We'll have to keep him here."

     "Wait … keep him here? Are you serious?"

     "Deadly serious."

     "But, isn't that kind of risky?"

     "Extremely risky."

     "Then, shouldn't we, maybe, try something else?"

     "There is one other course of action."

     "Termination?"

     "Yes, that's the one."

     "But not the one we want?"

     "Considering the investment we've put in to date, no."

     "But isn't the whole thing a failure?"

     "No, not entirely."

     "What could you possibly salvage from this?"

     "We aren't sure yet, but there are … possibilities."

     "So, you don't want to do anything permanent."

     "Yes, precisely."

     "What about contingencies?"

     "We have a plan in the works."

     "Already?"

     "Plans have been made. Documentation has been prepared."

     "You think it's as simple as that?

     "Of course not."

     "What else, then?"

     "People have been consulted. Other people have been put into play."

     "What people?"

     "The right people. Also, things are in motion."

     "But how?"

     "We keep several moves ahead."

     "Ahead of whom?"

     "Ahead of the others—the competition. We keep several moves ahead of whomever it is we need to keep ahead of."

     "But how do you know they're not ahead?"

     "Wheels within wheels."

     "Wheels within wheels?"

     "The gears are in motion."

     "What's that even supposed to mean?"

     "Nothing, really. It's just meant to sound … I don't know."

     "Mysterious?"

     "Deeply mysterious."

     "So that's intentional?"

     "Of course it is."

     "You're full of shit, you know that?"

     "Completely full."

Dear Corporate America: Stop it! Just … Fucking … STOP IT!

As the company continues to evolve its branding identity, we are making proactive structural adjustments in order to allow the management team to be better positioned for leveraging anticipated growth sectors while taking a more strategic role in driving the company forward.  

Our current structure has served us well to date, but it is not ideally suited to optimize additional new methods for business inter-operations. As such, we will be moving to a more strategically functional structure in this area, which is similar to the current structures in other areas of our business model. 

The newly created group will also evolve as we bring everyone involved in the core business needs of the department together within this group. We expect to be able to leverage synergies between the various roles while allowing greater strategic flexibility, thus allowing us to react to ever changing and increasingly complex business needs within the core competencies of  this departmental function. This new group will become primarily responsible for forecasting needs while managing expectations and logistics and ensuring that the overall solutions utilized to support the businesses are optimized across all sectors. We will finalize and communicate the specific structure and roles within this group at a future date, while the organizational structure of the business division will remain poised to support the growth needs of the business as they arise.

In terms of addressing the question of open positions in the organization, these new positions will provide us with anticipated resources needed to not only support long-term strategic growth but to also take a more active role in driving the business forward in the short term.

We sincerely hope you share our excitement as we continue to the next chapter our company's future. Our team looks ahead with an unyielding sense of commitment and the deepest dedication to what we hope to accomplish through this forward-looking evolutionary phase of growth.  We are embracing a heightened sense of enthusiasm and urgency for scalable improvement and continuous excellence moving forward.